The Stooges' drum roadie is

I should be sectioned

Jos Grain

Jos Grain is by far the nicest, wittiest, and just absolutely the bestest out of anybody who has ever had anything to do with Iggy Pop and the Stooges.

Intensely human in a very real sense, per se, devastatingly handsome and a creative genius, he is the real driving force behind the band and indeed, of much of Western Civilisation. At school he was so popular that the teachers and pupils made a special medal for him with the words "Most Fantastic Person Ever" engraved upon it, and then carried him around the school for the next three days on their shoulders, shouting "Hooray!"

He was for many years a restless and courageous adventurer, who single-handedly opened up some of the world's more inhospitable regions - such as the Heavy Woollen District of the West Riding of Yorkshire, for example.

He doesn't travel as much these days, and when he does it is generally under an assumed identity, as heads of state and other such types would discover his itinerary and drop all other commitments to meet him at the airport and award him the country's highest honour, the keys to the city, or an expensive cake. Such is his modesty that he found it a little embarrassing, so now he tends to avoid this sort of exposure.

If he has any faults at all, I suppose one would have to say... er... No, sorry. It's gone.


As the author and also the subject of this profile, I am all too aware that there may be some people who, cynically, maintain that I might over-inflate my own worth in a narcissistic and egotistical manner.

I have personally investigated this possibility, and I can assure these nasty, narrow-minded individuals that their fears are utterly groundless.

Thank you.

Please Hire Me. I am a experienced roadie and I own a very fast Mercedes Sprinter 316 van. I live in the centre of London, King's Cross. Where the shit is...

Contact +447970552067, or click on the logo below to send me an email.